Saturday 26 October 2019

How to get the best out of kids that don’t want to know…

By Mark Goodwin @markgoodwin8

A version of this was presented at New Voices 2019

I have been a teacher for over twenty years, so I am well used to “Teacher Conversations”; the one about the holidays; the one about the short working hours; and the one that goes something along the lines of “WHY?!...other people’s kids?..secondary?…what about the behaviour?!?”   Well now, I’ve got a whole new conversation starter (and a very quick conversation stopper!) because I teach mainly permanently excluded kids. When this comes up in conversation there is usually a look of mild panic, even fear but, to be fair, this is quickly followed by a genuine interest and a degree of respect – at last, in the eyes of some, I might be earning those teacher holidays!

In the past, to be put out of the tribe was the ultimate sanction – it meant no food, shelter or protection so it inevitably and quickly led to death. Currently, kids are being excluded from schools in staggering numbers and at ever younger ages. My teaching experience tells me the ‘what’ to teach these kids but I have developed a whole new ‘how’ to teach them and it is all encapsulated in a Cookie Jar.

The whole process of setting up the Cookie Jar starts with a chat about biscuits. I ask the kids about their favourite…the best for dunking?…cream or plain?...Hob Nob or Rich Tea?... etc. I remind them that biscuits are a treat and that they get stored in a special place, the Cookie Jar. But my Jar is not so much about taking out and stuffing your face with a sweet treat but putting in, building stores and keeping for the future. In fact, its not really about biscuits at all, I’m looking for things the kid has done well, learning or behaviour, and collecting these examples in the Cookie Jar – I am setting out building their self-esteem by recording, remembering & referencing ‘esteemable acts’….and putting them in something a kid can understand - The Cookie Jar.

STEP ONE Once the biscuit conversation is done and the Cookie Jar analogy established I set up the physical Cookie Jar and just creating the jar is a significant step because I am saying to the kid – “I have made this to collect examples of you doing well in the future….the jar is empty at the moment and you may not have done anything noteworthy for a while….but things are going to BE BETTER…. trust me I have faith in you… improvement will come, small step by small step, but it will happen and I will be there to see it and capture it….” By creating the Jar I am saying that I see and believe in them…even if nobody else does (A real demonstration of faith in the possibility of change that leaves me pretty vulnerable if I’m honest!)  What does believing in them sound like? I sometimes start with, ‘some of the greatest human achievements were made by people exactly in your position…sometime much worse positions… so of course you got this!’

STEP TWO I put a LABEL on the jar. I want to really see the kid – there is a wonderful phrase from the Zulu (and popularised by its use in the film Avatar) Sawubona, which means ‘I see you and in seeing you I bring you into being’. So I am REALLY trying to see the kid and find a new label, the opposite of the labels they have heard already….bad, naughty, disengaged, disaffected, pupil premium, free school meals, this estate/that postcode or disruptive, potential NEET etc…….labels that sometimes become an affirmation of the person who their perceived reputation has lead them to believe they now are….instead, I am seeing past this adopted mask, peeking behind the curtain and seeing who they really are….and, more importantly, what they MIGHT BECOME. This simple label on a Cookie Jar is staking out a small claim and planting a flag in their future. So, the new label, clearly placed on the Jar is their name, obviously, but also….Singer, Scientist, Historian, Engineer…king of Kerby!  The story of their future is yet to be written and they now have permission to write a new and better version every day according to who they might be, turning (my) Belief into (their) Action.

STEP THREE I need to prepare the way for the Jar to be filled. What do I need to be thinking? What is my mindset? How am I approaching this kid? I’ve mentioned faith, there is loads of that, but what about the science and research? Well, there is the Pygmallion effect – what I believe the kid is capable of doing will influence their ability to succeed i.e. a self fulfilling prophecy and there is Growth Mindset- and this leads to conversations about potential.
Talking about potential is potent because it is about the future, it is hopeful and potential is strengthened and ultimately realised, by its twin outriders, Responsibility and Relationships. These anchors, built into my approach to the Cookie Jar, allow for solutions-focused conversations when things are going well and the Jar is getting filled but, even more usefully, when things are difficult.

STEP FOUR Fill the Jar! I want something in the Jar so I throw a wide circle – for work and behaviour – I create a space where there is challenge and high expectations but also space for compassion, forgiveness, redemption and second chances. I always double plan the work – Not an OFSTED planning nightmare! – but simply thinking about what this work I’m setting looks like from their point of view, with their experience of learning  and with their needs. And don’t forget What Is In It For Me – I connect the work to their world and make the work meaningful, then it is easier to catch them being good, see the best part of a session and start to fill the Jar.
If I want kids to make positive changes and move from behaviours that I know are limiting and damaging then I have to make the new space as welcoming and engaging as nurturing & compassionate as possible. When they respond positively in this new space, whether behaviour or learning, this is what goes on the slips of paper and then in the Jar! Completed work? – in the Jar. Stayed on task? – in the Jar. Read out loud? – in the Jar…. Etc.

I said at the start about the ‘what’ and the ‘how’ of teaching. Well, the Jar reconnects me with my ‘Teaching Why’ it reminds me to be the teacher that I wanted to be and more importantly to be the teacher these kids need, as the mighty Rita Pierson says, to be these kid’s champion. Ultimately, the Cookie Jar is good for me because it is a practice I am working on, my inside job, in particular, getting my ego out of the way and being patient and kind – there are other things far more important than me being right. With the Cookie Jar kids get new choices not cornered. I get to BE PRESENT. HAVE FAITH. BE VULNERABLE – hard to do…. but the payback is second chances, new stories and lives back on track.

  

I originally came across the Cookie Jar Analogy in David Goggin’s unbelievable and inspirational memoir ‘Can’t Hurt Me’.

In summary - Use the Cookie Jar to connect and build relationships…
  • Create:  Believe& Be there
  • Label:  Don’t Badge
  • Prepare the way: Bend it
  • Fill the jar:  Bend it
  • Works 2-ways: Be you










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